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Monthly Archives: May 2025

Why, We Shall Smile

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May 31, 2025
Sports
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If this is to be the last stand of these New York Knicks, so be it, but they’re at least putting a show of faith into each other. Taking control of a must-win game at home early, and holding onto it: the formula, at least for one game.

It’s possible we didn’t learn anything about either of the Knicks or the Indiana Pacers, their opponents in these Eastern Conference Finals, from a 111-94 New York victory on Thursday night, allowing New York to breath for at least another two days while still down 3-2 in the series. The Knicks needed to retain their season, and the Pacers had some burn to burn ahead of a likely Finals matchup with reigning MVP Shai Gilgeous-Alexander and the Oklahoma City Thunder. Another matter for a different pen.

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Halfway Between Early And Middle

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May 17, 2025
Sports
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Going to use the government-issued city + nickname in tandem a few times; I really can’t believe this either.

It’s lost some novelty, but the thought is no shorter on veracity: New York City is never better than a) early summer, overall, and b) when one of the teams that plays at that time is still playing at that time[1]. Watching the Indiana Pacers complete a demonstrative victory against the Cleveland Cavaliers signified that anything was possible, right?

After the injury to Jayson Tatum and subsequent Luke Kornet Revenge Game, it didn’t seem likely that Boston could roll that again this series; in delivering a 119-81 victory at home against the defending champion Celtics, the New York Knicks – yup! – are putting it all together at exactly the right time[2].

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Advisors Heaving Plastic

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May 13, 2025
Sports
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In a stroke of grave and untimely brand crossover misfortune, Jayson Tatum currently features in an ad drawing parallels between Clark Kent in his day-to-day and himself, both of them morphing into Superman when necessary.  At least one of those things, I saw on Monday night; the other, with apologies to the Marvel/DC set, I wasn’t planning on seeing anyway.

Then, with 42 points, eight rebounds, four each of assists and steals[1], but with his Boston Celtics down 111-104 with a little over three minutes left to go, Tatum collapsed on a non-contact scramble for the ball against the New York Knicks’ OG Anunoby, who gathered the rock and dunked to put the Knicks up nine. Tatum grabbed his right ankle, left in a wheelchair, and the rest of us were left looking for Paul Pierce.

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Josh Hart: “I Was Trying To Order Some Uber Eats”

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May 8, 2025
Basketball, NBA, Sports
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Different, but exactly the same. In a strain of cowardice that echoes fouling Mitchell Robinson for the sake of it when you know he’s burning you, I’m abandoning (most of) what I said after Game 1 except for how that game made me feel, fuck it all: the New York Knicks can do this. Whether I actually believe that…[REDACTED]

The hedges, the ankles, the stomachaches you wait until 3 pm local time to hear about on either team’s injury list; the weirdo, questionable inability to hit open shots at home, as defending champions; and here we are: the New York freaking Knickerbockers lead the aforementioned champion Boston Celtics, having now beaten them twice at home after twice being down by 20 points following Wednesday’s 91-90 win.

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I Will Tell of All Your Deeds

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May 6, 2025
Sports
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If I had to guess, right now is likely the absolute peak of this New York Knicks season[1]. Surely the odds favor that. Until some team bad enough to do it comes along, the Boston Celtics are the league standard for excellence and efficiency.

This still figures to be a slightly more disorderly slaughter, but a slaughter nevertheless. Nevermind all that: with Patrick Ewing in attendance and everything to prove, Jalen Brunson and his merry band of shithousers stepped right up and snatched one off the register in front of the Celtics’ eyes.

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